Making a lifestyle change is hard and there can be so many barriers and challenges with remaining consistent. Last summer I was challenged to change my mindset and lose the weight I had been procrastinating on addressing. Everyone has different levels of comfort with their body image and their weight but I knew that it was time for things to change. While you can be happy, self accepting, have high self esteem and be overweight, I knew that it wasn’t working for me. I was tired of taking long airplane rides to other countries and being unable to comfortably fit into the seat while being ashamed to ask for a seat belt extender. It just wasn’t what I wanted. I was over my clothes not fitting right and only being able to wear certain select items in my closet because I had “outgrown” the majority of what I had available but didn’t want to spend more money to buy more clothes. I believe in radical self acceptance but I also believe in changing your lifestyle and being healthy if that’s a goal you have for yourself. It was a long, long road that still continues but I’ve made progress. I started with a personal trainer (aka my boyfriend), made the decision to no longer be vegetarian, I got off medication (after consulting with a doctor), started weight training, and changed my diet drastically. It wasn’t an overnight change and it didn’t happen as soon as I would have liked but I lost 45lbs and I’m still working towards my goal. Last week was the first time I could pick things from my closet to wear that I haven’t been able to fit in over 5 years. It was an amazing feeling and having a supportive partner has been great. I still have some progress to make but it’s nice to finally comfortably sit in an airplane seat without being black and blue from the armrest digging into my thigh. I’m determined to remain consistent and to continue to make progress. After all, it’s a marathon and not a sprint.
This week has been a long one for a lot of people. There’s panic, uncertainty, increased stress and a lot of people worried. There’s countless lives around the globe that have been impacted in some way. Some see this as an opportunity to take a break from a crazy schedules while others are feeling overwhelmed as they are tasked with finding childcare and entertaining their children in the middle of the school year. There’s isn’t an easy answer or solution to anything. The only thing that has been constant has been the rapid changes that have happened with the passing of each day. People are having to make adjustments in ways that they never planned to before. It’s a great time to be compassionate and show some kindness.
I’ve always had an interesting relationship with my birthday. It comes once a year and usually I feel unprepared. Last year and this year I decided to get away and take a trip. This year has had a lot of ups and downs. I moved, traveled, taught, and adulted through a lot. I’ve made some new friends and let some others go. I’ve reconnected with people and had an opportunity to take on some new responsibilities professionally. Lately I’ve reflected on the last decade of my life and it’s crazy how much can happen in ten years. Here I am four degree and several cross country moves later. It’s been an interesting ride but I’m looking forward to more personal and professional growth and new experiences. Maybe staying home for a change and putting down some roots for real.
I recently heard the saying, “Commitment without cash is counterfeit.” It immediately reminds me of someone entering into a relationship solely for material gain. However, I also thought about the value of money. People equate money with time as an example of the fact that once it’s gone, it cannot come back again. Standard old fashioned dates are not the rage anymore. People are more reluctant to part with their hard earned money in order to impress a potential partner. Each person would rather walk away without having any skin in the game i.e. parting with their money than to make an investment of money and time and hope for the best. I’ve had more invitations for parking lot (literally) meet and greets than I have liked and I think that it all relates back to this concept. One way to show interest is to give of one’s time and money. While it may not happen initially, it needs to happen before any type of significant commitment is made.
Last week I had the opportunity to do one of my favorite leisure activities–cruising. It was pretty good and I had the chance to chill out for a bit. I even had the opportunity to pick up a few continuing education units. The only downside was that I was on the clock so I was teaching six classes and responding to emails while on “vacation.” The food wasn’t great either but there really isn’t a substitute for being on the ocean. It’s so calming to look at. I’m looking forward to my next getaway.
This past week I had the chance to relax but also define some goals for next year. I learned a lot about myself and also managed to have some fun. Cruising remains one of my favorite means of travel.
The older I get, the more I realize that being a good parent requires copious amounts of patience. Day after day I meet parents with adult children who are literally sucking the life out of them. They live at home or close by and are constantly requesting more items and money. Yet, they can never make enough to move out of their parent’s house. I get that the economy isn’t typically kind to recent graduates and that it takes a lot more money than it used to in order to sustain a decent quality of life. The parents feel guilty because their child doesn’t have a decent job and can’t make it on their own therefore they open the doors of their house “for as long as needed.” Bad idea. While I know that everyone needs help at some point in their life and that hard times happen to everyone, there’s something detrimental about constantly acquiescing to the demands of your adult children because you want them to be happy with you. Living your life in perpetual sacrifice for your children HAS to stop at some point. It holds them back from becoming responsible adults and keeps you stuck in your life. You can’t continue to cater to the wants and needs of able-bodied adults who don’t feel like working and don’t want to move because they’re leaving their rent-free housing. I hear parents complaining about their children and how stressed that they are but refuse to put boundaries in place and enforce them. It’s not a pretty sight. These are people who won’t have a decent retirement because of their actions and the choices that their children have made. It’s quite unfortunate.
Vince PerraudWe crave your time. We crave you in the quiet of a Sunday afternoon, in the thunder of a Thursday storm. We don’t need much, just bring us your heart, pinned to your sleeve. Just bring us your mind, cupped within your palms. Bring us your closeness, your unhinged ribcage, your dreams and your…
I almost shed a tear reading this particular article. The author hits the nail on the head with this one. I think that introverts are often misunderstood because they don’t always let others into their inner world. I don’t know if I’ve ever read my wants written so eloquently and clearly. Great piece.
For some reason I’ve met a lot of people whose retirement plan consists of winning the lottery. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s a nice dream to have but the odds aren’t the greatest. I remember reading an article somewhere that talked about how millennials don’t want to spend decades doing the same job like older generations did. I personally can’t imagine doing the same job consistently for over a year as I get bored easily but also like consistency. The truth of the matter is that it’s important to challenge yourself. I’ve started to get into the habit of doing something drastically different every once in a while. It’s amazing how much you can plan and implement when you take some time off and reflect. I like learning new skills that build on my existing knowledge base. While all my jobs haven’t been fun, they’ve taught me so much about myself. I love the idea of stability but I hate when it gets confused with monotony. Life is short and should be lived accordingly. Self-reflection and planning is critical for success. Take the time to do that instead of staying in reaction mode all the time.
After working several consecutive night shifts, it’s safe to say that my sense of humor is similar to the one in this article. I know a lot of people right now who could really use some of the health benefits in the article by taking a break. Working in a windowless office can sometimes feel so confining and restrictive and despite the fact that the article is satire, there’s also a huge amount of truth to it. I wonder how many people would have better health if they weren’t so stressed out about their jobs. Don’t get me wrong, I love making money but I don’t always like the time and effort associated with acquiring it. There are definitely some times where there would be a legitimate therapeutic benefit of throwing my ID badge as far as I could and never looking back. However, that impulse is quickly counteracted by the rational thought that a replacement badge costs 20 bucks. Being in a field of work that is notorious for burnout makes you realize how important it is to take breaks. I’m in the process of figuring out the details on some trips I want to take this year and while it won’t be the equivalent of walking out my office and never returning, it will still be a break from it all.