When I moved into my new apartment I did something that I had always wanted to do—got cable television. Now granted I don’t have enough channels to even remotely keep up with things in the television world, but it’s been a decent deal. Of course my cable use has been supplemented with my TV antenna, Hulu, Netflix, and Amazon Videos so I really don’t miss a lot. I rarely watch things in real time but I’ve come to love the DVR. It’s so amazingly convenient to watch things when you want to. I’ve found a new favorite show to DVR–Modern Family. About 120 episodes worth if we’re being specific. It’s an awesome show about the daily life experiences and challenges of families. It’s not really a comedy but there’s this dry ironic underlying humor vibe that I like. Needless to say, watching an episode or so after a long day at work has been great for decompressing after a long frustrating day at work. It’s comfortable and doesn’t require a lot of thought…Self care right?
Tag Archives: television
Married At First Sight
Lately I’ve been watching a television show that portrayed a social experiment that was so intriguing. The show is called Married at First Sight and chronicles the experience of three couples who meet at the altar. The couples are put together by a group of relationship experts who match them based on comparability tests and personal interviews. While I admit the idea is out of the ordinary, I think there’s a lot of merit to it. The couples most likely would have never met if it had not been for these experts. As I was watching the show I asked myself if I could marry a perfect stranger in that type of situation and I would. It’s one thing to be set up by friends and family and another one to be set up by people who have studied human behavior and have years of experience and degrees in their respective fields. As someone who is familiar with many of the personality theories that guide studies on romantic interactions and the longevity of relationships, I would feel fairly comfortable marrying a perfect stranger in these circumstances. As I watched the show it was eye opening to observe how people requested certain traits and characteristics in their future mate but weren’t willing to compromise in order to complement those requested traits. An example of this was one of the women who talked and discussed with the experts at length on how much she wanted traditional gender roles and wanted a man who would do all the manly chores and be strong. Yet, she was appalled when she got what she wanted and found out that her dream man also expected her to cook for him. I’m a huge fan of social experiments and while matchmaking is a significant industry, it’s different when there’s a team working together to match compatible people.
Dexter
As I’ve mentioned before in some previous posts, I don’t watch a huge amount of television. As a result, I’ve grown to have an appreciation for the commercial free atmosphere of Netflix. In addition, it’s nice to watch seasons of shows instead of waiting for a week before the next episode. One show that has really grabbed my interest is Dexter. I just finished season 4. I only watch the show in short bursts because it can be fairly intense, but I’m drawn to the complexity of Dexter’s childhood and how it has affected his behaviors as an adult. By no means do I think that the show is child friendly but it is SO intriguing from a human behavior/psychology perspective. The show is about a blood splatter analyst (Dexter) who has a secret of his own. He wrestles with being a traditional family man and keeping his big secret from others. Dexter has had a traumatic experience in his early childhood that has set him apart from other people. He had a father who taught him how to function in a way that would prevent him from spending the rest of his life in prison. The unique thing about the show is that the storyline is in first person. Dexter struggles in every episode with what he is expected to be and who he really perceives himself to be. While Dexter’s challenges with his secret are more marked than many other people, in every season he becomes more of a person. Watching Dexter navigate his personal and work relationships is a reminder to me of how often we can stereotype or assume things about others. On the surface, no one would ever guess that Dexter has this huge secret because he struggles with being genuine and honest with himself and others. As a result, Dexter has few close relationships.
Black(ish)
So I just had the chance to watch the first episode of this new series on ABC. I will say that the name of the show was somewhat disturbing to me but after watching an episode, I better understood the rationale behind it. I’m not a super big TV watcher but this one intrigued me. Without giving away any super huge spoilers I wil say that this show addresses many of the challenges that comes along with being black in a very professional, corporate, and majority European American environment. Many times in these situations, you end up being a scapegoat for the entire race. I’ve been in situations where I was asked for the black perspective. Honestly, to this day I have no idea what exactly that is. This show is a depiction of the challenges of being black but not fitting into the neat little box of stereotypes that people envision you to be. The challenges of going against the status quo while not leaving your people behind. Playing the line between being relatable and competent while not losing your credibility with those who look like you is really hard. That’s one of the reasons why I really like the honesty in this show so far. There’s not an exact science to it and you can’t please everyone.
Thoughts from the Shark Tank
I’m not a big television watcher. This is largely due to the fact that I don’t really have the time and I don’t have cable. I’m not a huge fan of reality or game shows. However, the tv show, Shark Tank has really caught my eye. One thing that my parents drilled into me growing up was the importance of owning your own business. My siblings and I never got allowances because we were told that we were “allowed” to have free room and board. But I digress. Shark Tank is a great show because you get the chance to see people market themselves in order to grow their business. In fact, when you think about it, a lot of life depends on how you “market” or sell your skills to other people. One thing that is very apparent after watching the show is that that presentation is everything. Contestants on the show name their terms and how much money they need to pursue their dream and grow their business. They explain their services or products in detail and answer all the probing questions from the sharks. One thing that always amazes me is the number of people who do not know what they are talking about. It’s their business, their time to shine and they haven’t a clue. I came across a quote from Napoleon Hill this week that stated, “There is one weakness in people for which there is no remedy. It is the universal weakness of lack of ambition!” I can definitely agree with that sentiment and I think that there are many people who fit into that category. Starting your own thing takes time, dedication and ambition and I have a lot of respect for people who make that decision.
What a Scandal!
First of all, I’m not a huge TV watcher. I don’t have cable or satellite but I must admit that this particular television show has caught my attention. Scandal is a television show that is based on the life of Olivia Pope who fixes scandals that arise with many of the leading people in Washington. Ironically, Olivia has a scandal of her own and a closet full of skeletons. Olivia is also in an on-again, off-again relationship with the (married) President. This show has numerous twists and turns that you would never expect and there seems to be a new development in every episode. One of the reasons why I think that Scandal is so popular is because people can identify with one of more of the characters in some way. I think that the show depicts true human nature and life in general. On the show, individuals do things that you might not expect. While the characters on the show present themselves in a certain light, as the show continues, you discover that these people have done things in their past that have been either illegal, ethically wrong, or put other people in danger. Some of the questions that Scandal forces us to ask ourselves are: Where is the limit to human greed and selfishness? If you love the “right” person and marry them, is it then acceptable to fall out of love with them and pursue another relationship because the “right” person has now become the “wrong” person for who you have become? Is cheating really cheating when it is done fairly openly and the other partner knows about it and may even encourage it? The truth is that Scandal makes us take a look at ourselves. What lengths would we go to in order to protect the people that we love from harm? How would we say no to someone who is like a drug to use and makes promise after promise but is still married to someone else? As a therapist, one thing that fascinates me about the show is the effect that Olivia’s childhood has had on her significant relationships. There’s so much to say about her experience growing up and her lack of a secure attachment as she was going through her teenage years. But I digress. I say all that to say the answers to the above questions will vary based on your beliefs, background, culture, and a myriad of other factors. The question remains; If you were in a similar position as the characters in the show, would your decisions be different?
Alisha's Angle 