Tag Archives: fun

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New vacation experience

Recently I had the opportunity to take a few days off from work and go somewhere new. This year has been primarily spent in my cubicle so it was nice to have a change in scenery that did not include a view of the parking lot from my third floor window. Needless to say, instead of the usual vacation that included a hotel, rental car, and subsequent daily adventures, I went to an all-inclusive resort in Mexico. Upon arrival someone took our bags and we met our personal concierge who was our designated contact person. From carrying our bags to a third floor suite to picking up a dropped fork within seconds at the buffet, the service was amazing. It’s not often that you have daily housekeepers who actually CLEAN, unlimited food (and  top shelf drinks) along with frequent phone calls inquiring if you need anything. It was just really nice. While I wasn’t able to FULLY relax because I was spending too much time contemplating my life, it was nice to only have to decide between spending time at the pool or beach. After that experience I have to say that my vacation expectations have been raised and it will be hard to top the all-inclusive experience. After all, after never having to lift a finger for a week, who would want to go back to anything else?

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My first “real” date 

I always attempt to not tell personal stories too soon after the fact so that I doesn’t seem like I’m going after anyone. Anyway, this story is about 2 years old so I figure that it’ll be ok. Here goes:Two years ago I lived in a western state and decided that I was going to try online dating. I didn’t have any prospects and figured that after years of “focusing on school and my career” that it was time to at least test out the waters to see if the bad luck of college had followed me through graduate school. I created a profile on a very popular website that has tv commercials all the time talking about how people are matched based on their compatibility in multiple areas. I got matched with someone and went through all the preliminary questions in order to finally message him. I’ll call him “Sam.” Now, Sam looked really good on paper. He enjoyed playing soccer, had a masters degree and seemed pretty well rounded. We started talking and he asked for my number. Not too long afterwards he called me and we chatted for a bit. He had a Caribbean accent and seemed ok. He asked me out on a date and I picked a burger place not too far from where we both lived. I drove out to the place and got there early as usual. I went inside to wait for him. So he got there and he didn’t look like his picture. I take it back, he looked like his “from the shoulders up” picture. But I was looking at him in his eye. We were the same height. Now, I know height is something that can’t be changed and that no one has any control over so I kept an open mind. We got out seats and sat down and proceeded to order food. At that point I told him that I was a vegetarian and homeboy was flabbergasted. You would have thought that I said I was the offspring of aliens from Mars. “You’re just so weird,” was said multiple times during the conversation in response to other things that I disclosed (like being homeschooled). The food arrived with his coming first and he proceeded to eat while I was still waiting for my food. I understand that there are people who weren’t raised to wait for others before just digging in but I was still somewhat annoyed by his declarations of how weird I was. The conversation continued. He said that he was ready for a serious relationship and marriage and asked if I was on the same page. However under closer inquiry he disclosed that he lived in a 2 bedroom apartment with 3 of his friends and didn’t intend to get his own place anytime soon. Fine. Rents are high, you save money when you can split bills. Then he says that he doesn’t have a car . I asked why because it clearly wasn’t a financial issue (he was a CPA working for a decent sized firm), and he said that he didn’t think it was necessary. But you’re “ready” for a wife and kids? The conversation ended soon afterwards (to be honest I was just tired of being called “weird” 20 times in a row). When the bill came I’m pretty sure we split it as he didn’t offer to pay for what I ordered. We start to go outside and I realize how dark it’s gotten and I look at him. The poor thing doesn’t look like he could defend himself against anything, he looked about 115lbs soaking wet. He had taken the bus to the restaurant. So, out of some maternal urge to help someone in their time of need I had compassion (maybe pity) on him and offered to drive him home. He eagerly accepted the offer. So I took him home. He thanked me for not leaving him to wait for the bus in the dark. He tried to hug me before he got out the car and it was the most awkward hug I’ve ever experienced. He asked me when we were going to get together again. I smiled and never replied. Ever. 

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Jilly from Philly

I’m a Jill Scott fan from afar. I say that because while I like almost all her music, frequently play her Pandora station and listen to full albums on Amazon music, but I can’t name more than 3 of her songs off the top of my head. One of them is the one that I posted. It was my go-to during the months I worked night shift and I used to play it over and over. I don’t know how but her songs feel like a warm blanket on a cold day. They are genuine, transparent and capture the human experience with a lot of honesty. I got the chance to see Jill in concert over this weekend and she was great. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become more of a fan of music that not only tells a story but also transmits the emotion of the artist. That’s why I love Jill. Her music is warm and friendly reminding you of a godmother or beloved aunt that’s being honest about her life and experiences with love.

 

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Cable and my new favorite binge watching show

When I moved into my new apartment I did something that I had always wanted to do—got cable television. Now granted I don’t have enough channels to even remotely keep up with things in the television world, but it’s been a decent deal. Of course my cable use has been supplemented with my TV antenna, Hulu, Netflix, and Amazon Videos so I really don’t miss a lot. I rarely watch things in real time but I’ve come to love the DVR. It’s so amazingly convenient to watch things when you want to. I’ve found a new favorite show to DVR–Modern Family. About 120 episodes worth if we’re being specific. It’s an awesome show about the daily life experiences and challenges of families. It’s not really a comedy but there’s this dry ironic underlying humor vibe that I like. Needless to say, watching an episode or so after a long day at work has been great for decompressing after a long frustrating day at work. It’s comfortable and doesn’t require a lot of thought…Self care right? 

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Song memories 

This past week I had the opportunity to attend the concert of a singer I really appreciate. Working a traditional schedule makes being out late on work nights a challenge because of the consistent early mornings. However, it was something that I really wanted to do and none of his subsequent tour dates coincided with my travels. So I went and had a good time. I had listened to this particular artist for most of my life and it was great to be at a concert where I knew all the songs. While I sat up in the rafters (literally) I could see everything and had a great view of the stage. It always amazes me how easy it is to have specific memories whether good or bad to be associated with a song. Whenever you hear a certain song you can be transported to years prior and remember all the emotions connected to a specific memory. When I worked in a nursing home I remember how much music time meant to the residents because it brought back memories of their younger years. It wasn’t uncommon to see a few tears shed as they reminisced about the “good old days.” One of the reasons why I think music therapy can be so effective for people is that it really is a universal language that conveys the human experience in a way that everyone can relate to. 

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Getting Out

It’s been a really long week for a variety of reasons so I decided to make the best of my one day weekend. One thing that I really enjoy is music because it’s a universal language. There’s rarely any significant period of time that goes by without me turning on a song or playing an album by an artist I enjoy. I haven’t gone to a concert in a while because I’ve been either traveling or working but when I saw a flyer advertising the concert of an artist who I enjoy listening to, I bought a ticket on a whim. While I really wanted to stay at my house and sleep, it’s a goal of mine to get out more and be more social. Plus, I figured it wouldn’t hurt to go somewhere that didn’t require me to use my professional skills in some capacity. Despite the fact that I bought a ticket, I almost decided against going last minute because of all the extra effort. But I went and I’m glad I did. The concert featured soul music and many of the songs performed were remade versions of some great hits from decades past.  Avery Sunshine was among one of the artists that performed and she  was absolutely amazing as she sang and engaged the audience to sing her background vocals on one of the songs. There was great energy and I enjoyed sitting back and taking it all in. I have a lot of respect for artists who can hold a space without losing the audience and still be their authentic selves. Everyone enjoyed themselves and the concert finished around midnight or so. It reminded me of how therapeutic music can be. Maybe the focus this year will be on exploring where I live instead of traveling quite as much.

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2015 Lessons

As I’ve said in a previous post, it’s so hard to believe that the end of the year is once again upon us. This year has brought an abundance of life lessons that I didn’t quite plan on learning. I’ve included below the top 5.

  1. Everything isn’t always as it seems-sometimes you have to take the time to dig beneath the surface and find out what’s really going on instead of blindly accepting someone’s explanation.
  2. Comfort zones are great for people who don’t have a sense of adventure and don’t want to go anywhere in life.
  3. There are some opportunities that only come once so carefully (and I mean carefully) think about the ones you turn down for whatever reason.
  4. There are times in life that you have make uncomfortable decisions in the present that your future self will thank you for making in the future.
  5. There are some things and experiences that you’ll never experience until you travel outside the country and go off the beaten tourist path.
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Game Day

A few months ago I had the opportunity to attend a college football game. To be completely honest, I still don’t know all the rules of the game but it’s still fun to watch. The game was held in a city I consider to be my hometown of sorts. I lived there for 8 years as a kid. I remember all the traffic because of the people in town for game day, but never attended myself as a kid so I went back a decade later for the experience. The first thing that shocked me were the hotel prices that were hiked up several hundred dollars per night on a game weekend. Thankfully, I had a more reasonable option. On the day of the game I rode into the general vicinity with a friend and it was a sight to see. Thousands of people flooding into the stadium all wearing a combination of the same colors. Tailgating was quite popular as well. People seemed to be in a very happy mood and the only acceptable greeting was “Roll Tide.” The game chants began on the walk into the stadium and echoed into the stands. Normally, I spend extra to get decent seats at sporting events, but this time I decided to forgo my usual practice and sat up in the “rafters.” You could still see, but a misstep would be guaranteed death because of the height if you fell. There were people all dressed up in heels and dresses and some just opted for jeans and a shirt. Everyone was united on a common purpose–cheering the team on to victory. The beginning of the game was a huge production with entertainment provided by the band. The game itself was nothing short of an experience to watch. The home team was obviously better and we won without the opposing team scoring any points. I thought of the fact that a lot of people attend weekly religious services without meeting the person sitting next to them. However, it’s easy to have a running conversation about the game with all the people around you. Despite the sunshine being unusually warm, everyone seemed genuinely happy to be at the game. I can’t wait to experience it again.