Retiring a Discussion

I ran across this article pretty recently and it quickly caught my interest. I’ve included a link here .   I’ve seen seminars, books, webinars, and programs all addressing this topic. So many people (both men and women) claim to have the magic formula and list their own love story as the proof that their way works. This article was specifically addressing a Black women as a group. Between the interpersonal cues, relationship coaching, speed dating, and other means of “catching” a significant other. The article challenges that thought behind the idea that a woman’s life should be defined by her relationship status. But let’s face it, unmarried women who don’t have kids aren’t typically looked upon with the same level of respect as career women who are married and raising their kids and balancing it all in a (seemingly) effortless manner. The article highlights the fact that shame is often a part of the internal narrative of black women and explored how one’s relationship status can contribute to levels of shame. That thought made me wonder how many products and advertisements are targeted to someone’s level of shame. Products that are marketed in a way that make you feel inadequate unless you become a consumer of the product.  Very thought provoking read.

Still Slaves?

Still Slaves?

This article has been making its way around the social media outlets and I thought it was very very thought provoking. The writer basically asserts that the black church today has a similar mindset to those of the slaves hundreds of years ago. There’s no substance or teaching in the preaching and people easily get caught up in emotions (screaming and shouting) without actually learning anything and they leave on a euphoric high that only carries them through Monday. The writer states that in slavery days, the pastors did the same things. They didn’t teach but they whooped and hollered. He then compares them to their Caucasian counterparts who he says sat and learned how to manage money and how to actually be successful. I respectfully disagree because I think that money management and success aren’t necessarily something that traditionally is taught in church. Many times these skills and knowledge are passed down from older generations. The writer also refers to “hero worship” by the black church of their pastors. I think that he makes a very valid point. Something to think about